


Immortality is not so fun

by Siuvi



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Blood and Violence, Character Death, Dave | Technoblade-centric, Happy Ending, No Romantic Relationship(s) - Freeform, No Smut, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:06:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28265871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Siuvi/pseuds/Siuvi
Summary: Technoblade is an immortal, but he always wasn’t one. There was a time when Technoblade was like all the others, a human. So how did he become one?The story will follow Technoblade's life as an immortal, but during the story there will be black-flashes to his past as a normal human, which makes some parts confusing. Do not worry my child, every thing will be clear towards the end.There will be no romantic relationships between the protagonist and a side character (aka Techno is single as fuc-)
Comments: 20
Kudos: 113





	1. Lost memories

**Author's Note:**

> Please excuse my grammar mistakes. I've usually written fan fictions that are more focused on shipping, so this is new to me okay, good.

He draws his sword back to its original place, strangled by the belt on the right side. The man scoffs as he notices the annoying red marks on his white shirt, or it used to be white. He truly hates when people resist and end up ruining his clothes. He walks over corpses of the robbers, scanning through the area. When his eyes catches glimpses of little foreheads behind bushes, he scoffs yet again. “Scurry to your parents before I stab every one of you brats”, he threatens the little children, who earlier were captured by the now dead robbers. Soon the children disappear into the deep forest and their ‘savior’ continues his day like usual.

He walks until a familiar sound of water can be heard clearly. Well his shirt is covered in disgusting blood, so he turns to the direction of the sound. His long pink hair sways with the wind, even though it’s mostly held together by a single braid. A crown sits on top of his head, making his pink hair stand out even more. A red cape resting on his shoulders, and a mask that looks like some animal’s skull is protecting his identity from others by covering the top half of his face. His whole outfit stands out in the green forest, making him a perfect target if he wasn’t so skilled and confident with his trusty sword.

He stops in front of a lake. Not feeling very energetic he throws the red cape off his shoulders, a loud thud echoing from the drop. He takes off his shirt, relieving scars from years and years of battles and terror. He sits down by the lake and lets the flowing water do its work. He stayed there for a while, just enjoying the quietness and peace. After some time the shirt is finally free from blood and is put to dry on some tree’s branch. The man lays himself down next to a tree and lets out a very long sigh. “I just want to die…”

“Techno! Get up you lazy child”, a voice yells. Opening his eyes, Techno recognizes Philz’s face and loud yelling. “What? I was enjoying my beautysleep”, Techno complains, rubbing his eyes annoyed. “I have something, or rather someone to show you”, Philz explains happily. Techno shows no signs of interest in what the old man had to show him and lies back down. Philz gives an encouraging kick to the sleepy boy’s back. “Get up, you’re going to be a brother”, the old man states. This earned a painful yelp and a groan after: “A brother?” Philz nods and walks away, knowing the young boy will follow him. He was right.

Philz and Techno arrived at their little home and there was a boy. Philz quickly explained that he found the boy heavily injured and bleeding so he took him to their home. Soon Philz learned that the boy, Wilbur, didn’t have a home. Now they’re here and Wilbur and Techno will be brothers from now on.

“Hm. Do you know how to swing a sword?” Techno asks, he kind of could’ve expected this from an old man like Philz so he accepted it very easily. “No, but I know how to handle explosions”, Wilbur answers. The two young boys soon leave to find materials for explosions. That day Philz knew that these two boys will create chaos or something good. It only took a few years for Philz to realize which one it was.

The man lying under the big tree wakes up from his dream in cold sweat. He looks around frantically. Soon his breathing calms down after realizing the situation. “A dream straight from my own memories. Kind of rude isn’t it?” he laughs bitterly. Forgetting the dream quickly and putting his shirt and cape on, Techno continues his way home.

Sun disappears and a deep and cold darkness comes soon after that. The moon slowly starts to shine in a very humid light, still bright enough to help to see in the dark night. No one makes a sound in the deep forest, occasionally a bird would rustle its wing. Coming out of the forest there’s a village full of laughs, yells, people and light. They’re celebrating something. Techno is calmly walking closer to the village full of people. Soon close enough to see the banners and what was written in them: “Blood for blood god!” He raises his eyebrows in a curious manner, even if nobody would have not seen it because of the mask.

At some point, Techno finds himself watching closely as children celebrate. Their laughs and careless actions stirs something inside Techno. Hatred? No, it couldn’t be that. Jealousy — no, it’s not that either. The unknown emotion stays unknown, at least for now, since Techno is too tired to focus on himself. He moves his gaze from the children to the drunken men. They’ve taken notice of Techno’s unusual appearance. This doesn’t bother the man in question, it’s pretty common for people to stare at him.

“I’ve never seen you here before”, someone states behind Techno. Techno doesn’t bother answering. The other isn’t faced by the masked stranger and sits next to him. “I’m Tubbo”, he introduces. Techno acts like the boy next to him is not there, he really doesn’t want to be bothered at the moment. Tubbo seems to catch on, but doesn’t leave his place next to the other. A sudden question rises up in Techno’s mind. “What is this village celebrating?” the masked man asks. Tubbo’s eyes lit up. “The blood for blood god of course! He saved this village fifty years ago. Without him this village would not stand here today”, the boy explains, with stars in his eyes. Techno has never been so confused. Is that really something worth celebrating over? “Why that mask and that outfit?” Tubbo questions. He gots an scoff for an answer. Tubbo furrows his eyebrows, why did he scoff? “I like it. It scares people”, Techno smirks. “Oh”, the small boy mumbles. “Have you ever seen the god your village is worshipping?” Techno asks, finding some kind of comfort in talking to the boy. “No, but my father saw him! He said that he was scary, but had a really good heart!” the stars appear again in Tubbo’s eyes. The forgotten unknown feeling stirs again. “How old are you?” Tubbo is thrown off by the question first, but soon smiles. “Sixteen! You?” Tubbo is a lot older than Techno first thought. Leaving Tubbo’s question unanswered, Techno moves to an alley. Tubbo decides that it’s better not to follow the weird stranger, even though he had more questions.

Hours pass by and the celebration is moved from outside to the inside. It’s mostly adults at this point, since the children have gone to their dream lands. Beside that, Techno is still wandering around the village. He should be making his way home, but here he is, still in the small village. He has this feeling that he should not leave yet.

“Let go of him!” a loud desperate cry passes by Techno’s ears. “Tommy! Help!” Techno’s ears perk up, he recognizes this voice. “Tubbo!” another cry, and a sign for Techno. He adjusts his mask, a smirk forming on his lips. The rest happened by a flash.

He draws his sword, swiping the blood away before putting it back to his side. He feels two pairs of eyes burning into his neck. “You- You… killed them?” Tubbo says in a whisper, but it comes out more like a question. “Hm. Looks like it”, Techno observes. “Can you teach me!” a happy voice yells. Techno watches Tubbo’s friend amused, usually kids are freaked out when people are killed in front of them. “No”, he responds, and stares at the boys. The happy and excited one reminds him of —Techno shakes his head not wanting to remember his brother now. “You two kids go to sleep. Remember I didn’t kill them, they were drunk and killed each other”, Techno contends. “Wait! Tommy! That’s my name”, Tommy yells after his savior. Techno lets out a little laugh, kids these days.


	2. An open area

Two days without shedding any blood or causing someone’s death. It’s been awhile, since Techno has had this kind of peace of mind. Maybe it’s because of the route Techno chose. The route goes through an open area. This open area has something special in it though. It’s said to never end. Techno knew this, he knows better than anyone what it does to a man when something doesn’t just seem to end. Still in the moment of decision, it felt like the right route.

After two days of endless walking, the cape that he wears with pride started to feel heavy and unnecessary. Untying the knot keeping the cape on him, he threw the cape over just one shouldren. Such a small change helped more than he guessed. “I should get a summer version of this cape”, Techno notes.

The night creeps out and so does the sleepiness. Sleep sadly isn’t a choice, when wolves are crawling around you. Techno lets out a big yawn, keeping an eye out for the wolf that has been following him now for three hours. He’s aware that he’s in fact stronger than the wolf, but his gut feeling is trying to warn him about something. Through the years of living, Techno has learnt to trust his gut feeling, but still avoiding the voices. 

The wolf suddenly attacks. Techno skillfully takes a one step behind, the wolf flying just under his nose. Techno’s eyes take in the sight in front of him, and his mind understands just a little too late. The creature jumps again, clearly desperate to kill Techno. Too into his thoughts the creature successfully gets the masked man under him. Their eyes meet. 

“Jeez, kid. How long have you been stuck in here?” Techno questions dropping his head back. The creature, actually a human, stares in shock. “Uhh… A few years??” it answers. Techno nods understandably and throws the human off him. The human grunts a little. “Have you eaten many humans?” Techno interrogates, trying to decide if he should kill this thing or not. “None. Only animals, but it’s been awhile and you just happened to be there”, the other one answers, a little awkward after not talking to another human being for years. Techno digs through his little bag. “Here a potato”, he offers. The other takes it hungrily and the potato disappears in a second. “Name?” Techno asks, not feeling like having a big deep conversation about their lives. “Don’t remember”, he mumbles. 

Now that Techno was wide awake again, he notices the other’s unusual appearance. The other has two little red horns on top of his head and its eyes are completely white. The only thing keeping it warm is the black hoodie, trousers and a scarf. A feeling of relief and warmth over throws Techno's doubts. “What happened to you?” Techno questions in a calming manner. “Uhhh… I think I was cursed? Don’t remember much”, the answer is full of uncertainty. “Remember anything?” The masked man has taken notice that the other is clearly uncomfortable, but he doesn’t pay mind to it. The other with horns stays quiet, digging down into the furthest memories he can find. “Someone close to me used to call me Bad something!” He spokes happily. Techno adjusts his mask, that name is familiar to him. Then a face of a man who lives to annoy others comes to mind. “Want to get out from here?” Techno asks. Bad nods. So begins the endless walking, but this time Techno is not alone. 

“Techno! Calm down!” Philz's familiar voice calls out. Wilbur’s terrified face blurs Techno’s vision. “Technoblade!” Philz’s voice is now much more demanding and desperate. Techno snaps back to reality, looking around, vision finally clear. He has a sword aimed at Wilbur's heart. Wilbur is crying and shaking under him. Philz is holding his hands, trying to stop him from killing his own brother. Techno throws his sword away in panic. “Was- Was I just about to?” Techno asks in a low whisper. Wilbur has gotten up and hidden behind Philz, tears still dripping down. “Techno what happened there?” Philz asks, trying to stay as calm as possible. “There was this voice and- and- and… I don’t”, Techno tries to remember, but his head feels empty. A quiet whisper still clear in Techno’s head, causing him to start hitting himself. The pain drowns the whisper, but the guilt of his earlier actions is more suffocating than the pain.

That night, Philz had left to find someone who would possibly know about the voices that Techno mentioned. Wilbur avoided Techno at all costs, making the guilt Techno felt much bigger and stronger. Techno had accidentally raised his arm up to hit Wilbur in frustration, but luckily realizing soon his mistake. Techno spent the rest of the night apologizing outside of Wilbur’s room, leaving permanent marks on his skin.

“Wake up!” Bad yells, shaking Techno’s sleeping body. Techno shots up. “A dream”, he mutters to himself. Bad looks at Techno a little worried. “You okay?”, he asks. “Hm. Lets go, we’re almost out of this place”, Techno speaks. Bad doesn’t push him to answer and jogs up to Techno, since the other had already started walking. 

Like Techno said, they finally got out of the dead open area, it only took five days. At some point Bad was ready to give up again, but Techno’s confronting, threatening, words got him moving again. Bad was so happy to see trees and rocks that he shed a few tears. Techno stayed emotionless, the memories of his childhood and recent dreams burying him in sorrow. 

“So where are you headed now?” Bad’s cheerful and calm voice brings Techno back to reality. “Home”, Techno says in a low whisper. “Good luck, and I hope to see you again some day”, Bad smiles and walks who knows where. Techno had a few questions that he had for the other, but running up to him now would be embarrassing. At least he knows that the other will stay alive for a long time. According to Bad he was cursed around twenty years ago, but he still looked the same as then. He never truly remembered how he ended up in the open area, and he doesn’t want to. 

Continuing his way home after having a traveling companion, for only five days, feels empty. Techno rarely meets someone who understands his pain, Bad was one of them. Bad had this calming aura surrounding him, easing Techno’s mess of a mind. During those five days he was able to think clearly, thanks to Bad, and wonder if he should just turn back. He knows that it was an impulsive decision to go to see his home after these years, but he needs it. His past has been coming out more, making him suffer the pain once again.

Techno wipes his dirty sword with a wet napkin. Techno is very proud of his sword. The sword was a gift from a man he used to call his father. That man’s face is a little blurry in his memories, a side effect of Techno’s age. Techno likes to think that his father’s soul is protecting the sword, because the sword is only twenty years younger than Techno himself. There have been times when the sword almost broke in half, causing blood to rush into Techno’s eyes and kill the cause quickly. It’s the only clear and physical memory of the time he was ‘normal’. 

Something wet drops on the sword. Techno looks up to the sky, it’s clear. “What in the world?” he mumbles, trying to find where water drops keep coming from. His gaze falls down to the reflection from his sword. There’s water drops dripping from under his mask. With shaking fingers he swipes the tears off his sword. “I’m not crying”, he tries to convince himself, failing miserably. “I can’t cry”, he whispers, his voice missing his usual confident and proud tone. For the first time he feels pathetic, crying by himself while sitting on a rock not even aware of his own location just trying to crawl back home to his dead family. Hasn’t he suffered enough? Tears continue dropping down for the rest of the night, not until the sun peaks behind the trees he’s able to calm down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This turned out like shi-. Probably because I use writing as a way to cope with anxiety :)))) 
> 
> I'll try to make the next chapter more interesting.


	3. Same as me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still coping lmao...
> 
> The beginning is a little boring, but towards the end it will get better, trust me my child ;))))

Somehow Techno was able to befriend three people inside two weeks, but during two centuries he wasn’t able to befriend anyone. His gut feeling doesn’t find this the best thing to happen. If Techno had stayed in the mountains and never decided to visit his home, he would have never met Tubbo, Tommy or Bad. An amazing coincidence? Or something more.

Techno’s one week streak without blood ended very soon after he left the open area. He encouraged robbers, who were not open minded enough to have a civilian conversation, so blood was drawn. The sight, after his vision was clear again, caused Techno to shiver. Usually he would’ve scoffed like he had no heart, but the last month has affected him, in a way that he doesn’t like. There’s just been too many unwelcomed and new emotions that have confused Techno. 

Coming out of yet another forest he sees an expected village. Everywhere Techno goes there’s the same kind of pattern, that was easy to figure out. First there’s a forest that’s full with animals and different kinds of plants. Two out of three forests have robbers waiting in them, like the forest just now. Then comes the villages. This pattern is helpful, but recently it has been slowing Techno down. 

Techno strolls through the village he came upon. Usually the villages he visited were more sketchy and people who lived there definitely had never seen a real gold coin. This time though, the village was very well cared for. People walking around wore expensive looking dresses and suits. Many women had heavy jewelry around their neck. Some even wore crowns, making Techno annoyed since wearing crowns unironically is his thing. 

Techno usually has to stop to buy food only every four villages, but since he had to feed two people for five days, he ran out of food very quickly. Techno walks further into the village until his nose can pick up a delicious smell. Smirk on his lips he lets his nose lead him to the very needed food. 

Techno walks out of the bakery with a bag full of freshly baked bread and a few potatoes. He takes a notice of the large crowd gathered in the sight lines of the street. It looks like they’re making a way for something. Techno looks both ways, trying to find the thing that the people are making way for. Around the hill a white horse, proudly carrying someone on his back, comes to sight. Whisper conquers the street. Techno’s curiosity can’t do anything else than rise as the people around him are making pitying remarks about the one on the horse. The horse and the person on it pass by the crowd. The person wore a hat that has a long black fabric covering the whole person and their identity. Considering the whispers, the identity is also unknown to the village’s people, but the person’s worth is known by everyone —expect Techno. Curiosity hidden behind the mask, Techno begans to follow the horse, of course through the alleys, only stupid people would follow someone on clear sight. 

Techno follows the mystery person all the way to the other side of the village, that Techno came to know was quite large. The person finally stops in front of a huge mansion. There doesn’t seem to be too many people living in the mansion, but there’s a lot of security outside of it. Going inside would only take too much of Techno’s time and energy. Techno gives up on the idea of knowing the other’s identity and turns away. Then it hits him again, his gut feeling telling him something. This time warning him to not to back down. “Hm. I guess then”, Techno shrugs, some kind of excitement growing inside him. 

Night falls and people retreat to their comfy and safe houses. Only the brave ones continue walking outside in the dark, since it’s not really the safest and the most logical thing to do in the darkness. Usually Techno belongs to the ones who prefer sleeping at night and being in a safe place, but like it has been for the last month, he has something to do at night. 

Techno creeps closer to the mansion that holds secrets and mysteries, excitement flowing inside him. Sneaking past the guards placed outside is the easy part. Techno successfully sneaks past a guard, but his cape brushes against the guard. The guard whips their head around only to face the mansion’s blank wall. “Behind”, Techno warns before knocking the conscious out of the guard, not killing them, just helping them to take a little nap. Techno breaks a window, giving up on the idea of hiding and being sneaky. It's not like him, it’s tiring and very boring. The loud sound of glass breaking is like a trigger that starts a huge chain reaction. Guards yelling and running frantically everywhere, trying to find the cause of the sound. Techno scoffs, in some sick way this is kind of fun for him.

Techno finds his way to the second floor, where he guesses the one he’s looking for is located in. Earlier he had stalked, through the big windows, the unidentified person and where they were put in. Remind you, the mansion looks entirely different from the inside. Techno recognizes a few corners and paintings, but the rest is new to him. He takes a turn to the right and hits the jackpot. The hallway he just arrived at is full of panicked guards protecting one singular door. A big grin forms on Techno’s lips as the guards run straight at him.

It took around fifteen minutes for Techno to knock out everyone, somehow just more and more guards kept appearing before him so it took a while to run out of guards. The guards had not really been a thread to anyone, especially not for him, so he decided to let them live. Even though the voices ringing in his ears were telling him the opposite the whole time. Techno waits for his breathing to calm down and his vision to clear. As his eyes began to focus, the big wooden door opened. 

“Who are you!” a small and pretty woman yells. To Techno it looked like for a second that she was waiting for someone else. “Not the one you were expecting, huh”, Techno speaks. The woman stays quiet, her eyes trying to find someone from the stack of people knocked out on the floor. She lets out a relieved sigh. “Are you the one I’m looking for?” Techno questions, knowing the woman in front of him knows who he’s referring to. The woman shakes her head. “No, but I can help you to find him ,'' she smiles. Techno notes internally that he’s in fact looking for a male. Techno doesn’t ask the woman's motive to help him, but she seems trustworthy, and he can just kill her off if there’s need to. 

The woman leads Techno down the stairs. Techno knocks out a few more guards, again not killing any of them just helping them to take a nap. “I’m Niki. I play the doppelganger of the person you’re looking for”, Niki explains, wanting to kill the awkward quietness between them. Techno nods, now understanding why he found the wrong person. He probably had mixed up the two at some point, it’s pretty hard to see clearly from so far outside. “Who were you waiting for?” Techno asks, as a way to keep the conversation flowing. He sucks at talking with women even after so many years. “No one”, she stutters. Techno is not one to care for others, so he doesn’t dig in any further. 

“We’re here”, Niki extends her hand in a comic way. Techno takes in his surroundings, he’s obviously in a basement. His ears perk up as the excitement raises inside him. He offers a little nod to the woman, who was nice enough to help him, as a thanks and walks into the basement’s darkness. “Be careful! He doesn’t bite by the way!” Niki yells, before backing away and going back to her chamber. The remark was not expected, but it really didn’t face Techno. He’s seen it all already.

The basement is a long dark hallway. There’s no guards in sight, but dead rats can be found laying everywhere. It’s so quiet that Techno can clearly hear how his hair and cape clap together after every heavy step he takes. The walls are ruined and some parts fall down as Techno passes by. It truly is a terrifying place to be in, but the emotion Techno feels is not close to terrified or scared. He feels like he’s where he belongs —a place where he’s drowned in pain and guilt of his past actions.

“Didn’t I already kill enough for today?” a voice asks sarcastically. Techno comes from the shadow that covered his appearance. Now that the other clearly sees Techno standing on the other side of the bars he freezes. “I came to get answers to questions. Seems like I got one already”, Techno observes. The creature standing behind the bars is a fox, but has some human like features. He’s wearing human’s clothes, but his thick orange fur and the face of a fox says he’s not in fact a human. “Who are you?” the human-like fox asks, scared. “I’m a little like you. Not completely human, but not completely an animal either”, Techno mentions with a big smile plastered across his face. The other looks like he could pass out from how scared he was of Techno. This just turned out to be something completely different.


	4. Glasses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a reminder where I remind you my child, that Technoblade is way older than anybody in the story and that's why he calls almost everyone a kid, okay, good.

Techno kicks down the bars, causing a loud sound between the iron bars and the stone floor. “Name?” Techno questions, flapping dust away from his cape. He waits for an answer, but the other doesn’t utter a sound. Techno takes a step forward. “FUNDY!” Fundy yells, jumping a little. “Don’t need to be so scared kid. I just want answers”, Techno remarks, walking closer to Fundy. Techno’s remark doesn’t help the scared fox, it only makes the other more scared. Techno sighs, didn’t this little fox mentioned killing earlier and now he’s scared of him. Echoes of many foot sounds catches Techno’s attention. “We’d better get out of here”, Techno says, putting his hand next to his sword.

“Uhhh… Will you kill them?” Fundy asks, his voice quiet and still a little scared. Techno managed to drag Fundy out of the cramped cell, but the other isn’t very cooperative making everything annoying. “Hm. Depends”, Techno scoffs, why’s this kid worried about that. Fundy gulps. “So… uhhh… Did they do tests on you too?” Fundy fiddles with his paws. Techno stops, the question hanging on his mind. “They’re here!” a guard yells. Techno leaves the question hanging on the air. “You know how to fight, right?” 

Techno knocks out guards left and right, none of them being a real challenge. Fundy is struggling a little more than Techno, but is still able to knock out a few pairs down. They make it to the stairs, there awaiting them different looking guards. “Fuck”, Fundy lets out a whispered curse. Techno studies the new guards. They have more gear and lack the fear in their eyes. He smirks. “Why is there a smirk on your lips? Those are the best of the best”, Fundy explains absolutely terrified. “They’re going to kill us”, he adds. Techno’s gaze turns to look at Fundy. A glint of red flashes from the mask, sending shivers down Fundy’s spine. “Technoblade never dies”, Techno states and the guards jump at them.

“Techno you need to wear glasses, you know that”, Philz reminds Techno, who’s too busy swaying his sword uncoordinated at trees. “Techno, put these on”, Philz demands, holding Techno’s square glasses on the tip of his fingers. “Hm”, Techno mumbles, not really fond of his new glasses. Philz sighs, stealing the wooden sword from Techno’s grasp. “What!” Techno grumbles. “You and I know that your sight goes blurry, when you get too into the fight. Remember what happened last time? You almost killed Wilbur”, Philz argues. “It happened two years ago!” Techno notes, rolling his eyes as a way to hide the guilt he still feels to this day. “Technoblade”, Philz voice is stern and desperate. Techno hates to hear Philz using his full length name. He steals the glasses and puts them on, not sparing a glance at the old man. “Thank you”, he hears a whisper, before going back to swinging his sword with his glasses on.

Techno shakes his head. Once again coming back to reality, where the sight of bodies waits for him. “How did you…” Fundy doesn’t even finish his sentence, cold shivers go through him as he meets Techno’s gaze. “Lets go”, Techno speaks, taking a deep breath in. Techno has no memories of the fight he had just, but he knows that he did accidentally kill a few. Fundy jogs up to him, not questioning the other. 

It seems like there’s no more guards, since they were able to walk to the front door without interruptions. “Wait for me!” a high pitched voice yells after the two men. “Niki?” Fundy calls out. “I’ll come with you guys”, Niki states. Fundy looks up to Techno, he doesn’t dare to make the decision. “Hm. You two are on your own after I’ve gotten my answers”, Techno informs and makes his way out of the mansion, his excitement noticeably calmed down almost completely gone. Niki and Fundy follow him, but leaving space between them and him.

The trio sneak through the alleys, even the dark night can’t hide them in the ruckus caused by the news of someone breaking into the mansion. People rushing the last ones inside the safety of the buildings. Even the brave ones are disappearing into their houses. Guards and village’s police are running and looking everywhere. Orders are yelled and changed every minute, but there’s no signs of the lost fox or his companions. 

Niki lets out a victory yell as they make out the village. “Niki! Don’t yell”, Fundy warns, being a little paranoid. He kind of regrets escaping that place, but he doesn’t have to kill anymore. “Sit down. I need my answers now”, Techno says, the other two sitting down immediately. “Why were you locked behind bars, but still people are gossiping about you like you’re the most important thing ever to exist”, Techno interrogates. “I was sold here and my meaning is to kill those who the village see as living threats to them”, Fundy explains, cringing at the memories. Niki pats Fundy’s back, trying to give comfort to the other. “Hm. Why would you need someone to act as your doppelganger then?” Techno wonders. “In case people like you come to take him away”, Niki voices, making Techno to adjust his mask. “You were the one to show me where Fundy was”, Techno notes. Fundy was not aware of this fact and looks at Niki confused. “Ah, yes. You seemed like a good guy and I know Fundy hates it there, so I kind of used you to get us out of that place”, Niki explains, waving her hands in an apologetic way. Techno doesn’t react much to how this kid just had used him, without him knowing, he’s a little impressed. 

“Uhhh… So did they do tests on you too?” Fundy brings out his question from earlier. Niki’s face changes to a panicked one, scared of how Techno would react to such a question. “Hm. They did, but never got the chance to finish what they started”, Techno answers, leaving plenty of space for more questions. “There’s a village where you two can hide. There are two young boys, they can help you to get used to living there. Here’s a map and don’t even think about going through the open space here”, Techno takes out his map and points to the open space, where he had met Bad. “Stay safe kids. You’ll easily find the two boys. They stand out quite a bit”, Techno remarks, waves and leaves Fundy and Niki to study his map. Techno finds himself snickering a sentence he finds funny to say: “Kids these days.”

Techno wanders around, waiting for the sun to come out so he can see clearly where to head next. “I should get glasses”, Techno mumbles to himself. Techno gets too into his thoughts, that he misses the big tree in front of him and walks into it. “Ow”, he yelps, the mask making the contact just more painful. He looks around and adjusts his mask. “Act like nothing happened, you’re still cool”, he asserts, throwing his long hair out of his face.


	5. Last village

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say that I love you my child and you deserve the world :)!

He draws his sword, hands shaking. He has no energy left, it feels like the will to live was just forcefully dragged out of him. He drops the bloody sword down. “Philz…” he lets out, just above whisper. His shaking hands rush to press down on the bleeding wound, but another pair of hands stop him from doing that. “Philz, you’re going to bleed out soon”, Techno cries. Philz should be angry, disappointed or at least feel betrayed, but a big loving smile is the only thing Techno can see through his blurred vision. Philz caresses the scar on Techno’s face that the laboratory caused. “Don’t move. I’ll get Wilbur. He knows how to treat wounds. And- and”, Techno begins to ramble, hands shakily removing the gentle fingers away from him. “You’re a good boy”, Philz lets out a laugh, but soon grunts out of pain. “No. No. No. No. No. NO!” Techno repeats endlessly, as the older man’s eyes flatter close. 

Techno screams. 

Techno sits up, his whole body covered in sweat. He throws his cape off of him, that was keeping him warm in the cold night. “Shit”, he curses, stretching his arm out and taking the mask off the grass. Maybe he should stay the next night in a motel. Something about his mask caughts his attention. The mask is a pig’s skull, it has been covering half of Techno’s face since someone passed out when they saw his scarred face. He first disliked wearing it strongly, like his first glasses, but soon found wearing it more convenient than he wouldn't have thought. People stay away from him without having to ask, Techno’s oldest dream came true only because of the mask. Nowadays it’s harder for him to put it back on his face, but why? It’s part of who he is ─or who he shows to others.

Techno shrugs off the useless worries and puts the mask back on. He backs the things that he had scattered all across his surroundings last night, and continues his way home. According to his oldest map, soon the useful pattern of where villages are located will not work. After the next village, the next food source is his home. “Maybe if I now turn back, I will not regret it that much?” Techno wonders out loud, his head being too messy for thinking straight at the moment. “But if I was to turn now, all the memories would sneak back to me and cause unneeded emotions to rise. It’s been a hell to handle them now, so they would probably be just worse”, he mumbles. He argues with himself, only to come to the conclusion that it’s better to continue. Guilt is better to overcome than drowning in it, that what Philz used to say. 

Techno is close to where the forest ends, only to hear a voice. He freezes on his spot, not daring to move a muscle. “...” He hears it again, this time a little louder. It can’t be one of the voices in his head, they don’t sound so sweet and calming. “...” Again, Techno can’t feel anyone’s presence close by. Has he developed a new voice, because of what he has been feeling lately? “Show yourself!” Techno demands, slightly shivering as a cold breeze over throws him. “You dumb bitch”, the voice swears at him. Techno goes into a shocked confusion. Did a voice just swear at him. The cold breeze, that somehow stayed there for a minute, goes away and the voice goes with it. Techno dismisses the thing that just happened and leaves the forest. It’s not like this is the first time he hears voices out of nowhere.

Arriving into the last village he will visit for a while, Techno hurries to the library. Compared to the other villages he’s visited during his travels, he knows this village like the back of his hand. He and his brother used to sneak here, when their father was away, and do a little pranks on the people of the village. They used to do it so much that at one point their father got an actual complaint by the village’s head. The day that Techno’s life turned into hell, he visited the library for the last time and hid a letter there, just in case he decided to visit home. The village is almost the same as it looked two centuries ago, but all the faces walking in the streets are different. Many of the buildings have been renovated to look better and newer, still all the shops stand where they used to in Techno’s younger days. Techno doesn’t miss the big wall where many legends based on the close mountains are written and put up, and certainly he doesn’t miss the big letters telling the story of the blood for blood god’s. He scoffs, the legend is written to be way more than it actually is. Techno doesn’t give a second glance and opens the library’s door. 

Not wanting to spend too much time around people, Techno tries to find the letter quickly. He would’ve been quick, if he remembered where he had put it in. His memories are already very fuzzy from that day, but over the years, he’s forced to live, his memory of the past has gotten worse. He isn’t able to recall his own brother’s full face or his father’s, so how is he going to remember where a little letter is hidden in.

Techno has given up the chance of being quick about finding the letter, and instead he’s looking through the library slowly and calmly. Slowly people have been leaving the library, leaving only the young worker and a masked man alone in the library. Even with no people around, Techno is not able to recall the hiding place. It’s starting to frustrate him, he’s not a very patient person and he’s aware of that. 

“Uh… Excuse me the library is about to close”, Techno looks down at the source of the voice just now. There stands an ordinary young girl, probably trying to earn money for her family. Techno’s staring seems to freak out the girl. “Or you can stay as long as you want. I’ll wait by the door. You’re welcome to look around, there’s no need to worry about using up my precious time”, the girl quickly speaks and hurries away. Techno clearly heard the change of the tone, when the girl spoke the last parts, but who can he blame. 

A cold breeze touches Techno’s skin as someone whispers close to his ear: “Behind the legends.” The voice and coldness disappeared as fast as they came. It feels like the last puzzle piece was just placed down as the letter’s hiding place comes to Techno’s mind. Techno hurries to the back of the library, his eyes locating where the legends category is placed. He pushes the books away that are placed in the middle. Behind the books appears an old and very dusty looking letter. Techno mentally thanks the unknown voice as he takes the letter. He’s about to open it, but a certain worker’s salty words travel to his ears. Techno grips the letter tightly and sighs. He leaves the library, letting the young girl go to her family.

A night has fallen over the village. The village is located very close to mountains, and it’s located kind of high up from the waters, so the nights are ruthlessly cold. Techno doesn’t have to worry about the coldness, because of the heavy cape he wears. The cape is handmade by someone from Techno’s dark times. Dark times, referring to Techno’s first ten years after leaving his home once and for all. He remembers nothing of the person, but he knows that the person was wise and died of untreatable illness. Their death caused Techno to really come back to reality. He remembers crying over that person's and two of his family members’ deaths that day. If it were not for that person, he would be still fully controlled by the voices in his head. 

The letter can wait for morning, Techno needs sleep for now.


	6. Ruckus

Techno lets out an annoyed grunt as the morning sun gives the room natural light. Techno sits up, his hair going everywhere. Apparently Techno had a quite restless night, his long pink hair had broken out of the braid that had kept the hair together. Techno comps his fingers through his front hair. He has always had pink hair, but its length used to be a lot shorter. Maybe it’s because his brother used to like braiding it and Techno just wants to remember his brother's gentle touch, as he would make an awful looking braid out of his hair. 

Techno’s ears pick out loud voices coming from under his room’s window. He lets go of the hair he was staring at so intensely just a moment ago. Automatically a mask is placed to cover Techno’s identity and the big scar. He shuffles lazily to see what is the reason for this early ruckus. People are standing in front of the motel he decided to stay in. The expressions on the peoples’ faces are hard to understand. One looks like they want to leave and hide, another looks like their eyes are going to burst with anger. Techno shrugs, usually there would’ve been a little curiosity in him, but he has a letter to read.

He takes out the letter from inside his cape, he knew putting a secret pocket was a good idea. His fingers trail the fragile old edges of the letter. He slowly opens the letter, his leg pushes a chair out from under the table. Techno sits down, turning the last fold open. The letter is written in red ink, something that Techno had forgotten. Well he doesn’t remember even a word from what’s written on this letter. Techno stares at the letter, he can only recognize his own name. His handwriting is just awful and almost unreadable. “This is going to take a while”, Techno mutters, taking another piece of paper and a pen. He needs to write the letter again this time in neat handwriting. 

A knock on the door interrupts Techno. He’s halfway through the letter, but still far from understanding what he has once written for himself. He stands up and swirls his cape back on his shoulders. Techno hides both the letter and the clearer version in his secret pocket. He makes sure that his mask is in its place and his sword is ready to be drawn, if a danger were to appear. He sighs, ready to face the thing waiting for him behind the door. Techno turns the door knob, relieving the motel’s owner. The owner was the one working when Techno bought the room for the night.

“You must have noticed the people outdoors”, the owner says, wiping his sweat away. “They’re here to make sure that you leave this village”, the owner adds, nervously trying to decide if to look at Techno’s mask or the wall behind him. “Why was I blessed with the honor to be escorted out of this village by its people?”, Techno questions in a monotone voice. His calm reaction seems to freak out the poor owner. “Your appearance is scaring the children, and most adults don’t like the way you carry yourself around so proudly”, the owner explains, acting as nice as possible. Techno scoffs: “People here are still close minded scary cats.” The owner’s mouth hangs open, shocked from the other’s bold words.

Techno is about to walk out, but a cold breeze passes by him whispering a reminder: “Your hair.” Techno excuses himself back to his room with a little nod. The owner lifts a finger about to argue back, but they’re met with a closed door. Techno combs his hair with his fingers, since his actual comb had broken a few weeks ago. He rarely has to do his braid again. Techno parts his hair in three sections. “Happy thoughts”, he whispers. Ruining a calming moment with bad thoughts can damage good memories, is something that Wilbur used to say when braiding Techno’s hair. 

The people waiting for the masked man heard the little stunt the other had pulled and now are banging against the door. Closing a door on someone is seen very disrespectful in these parts, it seems. “COME OUT!” they yell. Between the yelling and banging, the poor owner’s pleads asking them to stop is barely heard. Techno finishes braiding his hair, he swings it over his shoulder. He brushes a few fallen hair pieces from his shoulder. Acting nice won't get him out of this unnecessary situation. 

As the sun hides behind clouds, a masked man kicks down a door. All the people, who were yelling a second ago, are now quiet. They obviously were not expecting for Techno to kick the whole door down. Techno doesn’t bother making conversation about the situation and leaves the motel, not forgetting to offer money for the door to the owner. As the big group of quiet people see the other’s cape disappear out of the motel, they quickly follow him. 

“Hey, you! Who do you think you are!” an elderly woman yells after Techno. Techno turns around, still walking. “The second worst thing to happen to orphans”, he answers. His statement's meaning was only to stir negative emotions in the group of people, as a way to make them stop following him and shut their loud mouths. Instead they start throwing leftovers at the masked man. Techno has no problem in dodging most of them, but the voices are not happy with only dodging. The voices want to see these people suffer for the daring action they took towards Techno. The voices don’t certainly want revenge, they just want blood. Techno knows that, but seeing how unstable he’s been, he can’t overpower those voices.

“The most important thing is to know how to be more powerful than the voices inside your head Techno”, those words come to Techno’s mind as he’s holding his sword. He has stopped walking, but he can’t feel any food thrown at him. Techno’s vision clears. A smile creeps ups, as he doesn’t see corpses laying all around him. He looks up to see the people staring at him terrified. Techno puts his sword back to its place and continues his way out of the village. Techno tries to think back at those words that came to his mind, just before he would’ve wiped out those arrogant people. Who is the owner of those words? He can’t remember what the voice that said those words sounded like, but he knows that it wasn’t the voices in his head. 

Techno walks into yet another forest, this time the usual green colour is hiding under the white layer of snow. The distance between the snow forest and the village was only around twenty minutes long. Techno is still caught up in trying to piece together the words and a face. It’s so familiar and so unfamiliar. It’s on the tip of his tongue, but it’s still not there. His fists tighten up as the puzzle doesn’t seem to solve, no matter how hard he tries to remember. 

“Shouldn’t you focus more on that letter than whatever is going through your head right now?” “Shut up, Wilbur. You don’t know any better”, Techno snickers. As the words register inside his head, he whips his head around faster than ever before. “And now you recognize me?” Wilbur laughs. Techno’s eyes widen under the mask. In front of him stands, flies, the ghost of his dead brother and it's talking to him. “You died in front of me”, Techno breaths out, his mind is going crazy. “Yes, and you’ve lived two centuries and still look the same as when I died”, Wilbur observes.

Clouds move away, giving sun space to share its warmth and light. The snow glows as the sun’s light comes down on it. The two brothers stare at each other, only one of them is actually alive, but neither of them count as real human beings. The one, whose through you can slightly see, is waiting for the other’s reaction. Only if he knew what’s going on in the masked man’s head. “You died in front of me”, Techno repeats a little quieter.


	7. Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!TW!!  
> Mention of suicide
> 
> This chapter is a lot more serious than previous ones have been, this is just a heads up for you my child

“You know that Philz death is your fault, right?” Wilbur speaks, his voice loud and clear. Wilbur smirks knowing the effect that sentence has on Techno. Techno lets out a laugh. He turns to face Wilbur, staring straight into Wilbur’s eyes. Those eyes have lost the caring look they once had, now they hold a maniac look craving chaos and unhappiness to those around them. “You sick bastard. You were not there when it happened, so you have no right to say that! You were too busy with exploding villages”, Techno yells, pulling his short pink hair trying to stay sane. “And if you were there, you could’ve saved father! You useless maniac!” He adds, voices getting stronger inside his mind. Wilbur notices the other’s unstable look, Techno’s right eye having a glint of red in it. “You’re so weak that you can’t even control yourself. Plus that scar, you pig”, Wilbur laughs, a feeling of regret flowing in him after the last words. Techno falls on his knees. “I’m not a pig, I’m a human”, he mumbles hands hovering over the scar on his face. He looks up to his brother. 

“Am I a pig?”

Wilbur is looking for the right words, he went a little overboard. “Hey, Techno. You’re a human”, he tries to comfort the other. A square pair of glasses fly towards Wilbur, successfully making a red line across his cheek. “Techno, calm down”, Wilbur whispers, fear making his hands shake. If Techno were to kill him now, Techno would never come over his fear of the voices. Wilbur’s messed up brain makes a decision. Techno picks up a sword, eyes holding a dangerous glare. Wilbur copies him, and draws his sword, his eyes telling a different emotion ─affection. Both of the swords glow in the dark, pointing at the same heart. 

Techno feels his eyes burning, tears threatening to fall down. The memory of the brothers’ last meeting, now clear in Techno’s head. He takes a deep breath in, calming himself down before the storm. “You killed yourself in front of me, called me a pig and blamed me for father’s death. Now you’re standing in front of me, dead, what are you even thinking? Hey! What if I did kill myself in front of my very unstable brother and traumatized him for life, he probably wont even remember anymore” Techno mimics, shaking his head in disbelief. Wilbur sighs, moving closer to Techno. “I had lost my sense of self back then! I never thought you would come back, and when I saw you, I didn’t know how to react. I was not able to go to the afterlife with all this heavy regret on my shoulders”, Wilbur explains, taking in Techno’s changed aura. Techno was broken and in denial the day when Wilbur killed himself, but now Techno stands there shoulders up in a proud way, his confidence showing in the way he walks so sure of his destination. 

“Don’t look at me with that pitying look”, Techno snarks, hating how Wilbur dares to talk to him so familiarly after he left him to suffer alone. “You’ve just changed”, Wilbur observes, he wants to touch his brother’s hand and braid his pink hair that is noticeably longer than back then. “And you have not. You still think that you can get everything you want without doing anything to deserve it”, Techno says, taking a step backwards. To Wilbur those words feel like he was shot with fire arrows that go through him with ease. Techno is right, he hasn’t changed, the only thing different is that he’s dead and a ghost now. “Can you just get out of my sight. I still have a letter to rewrite”, Techno asks, he’s hurt the other’s pride enough for today. In the blink of an eye, Wilbur disappears. 

Techno falls backwards on the snow, face ending up facing the clear blue sky. The snow relaxes Techno’s intense will to kill his brother, even if the other is dead already. Techno doesn’t mind the cold or how his limbs are shivering. The voices whisper more and more violent thoughts every passing second. His mask falls off his face. There’s no need to put it back, the cold breeze on his scar silences the voices. The scar and the voices came at different times, but they still have some kind of connection that is not yet to be figured out.

The burning sensation has not left Techno’s eyes. Giving up the confident act, he had kept around Wilbur with gritted teeth, tears trickle down his eyes. “Pathetic”, he laughs, wiping tears away. The cold and tears do not combine well together, they only cause stinging feelings in the big scar. The scar is a painful memory from the laboratory, maybe if they had been successful like in Fundy’s case, Techno would not have the scar —but suffer as a pig. 

He feels like throwing up as the thought of being a pig comes to mind. Laugh, a painful laugh of sorrow. The mask laying in the glowing snow, cape between the snow and the body, tears falling down and a man who suffers from his unresolved pass creeping up on him. Dead brother observing this broken man from next to him, invisible as a ghost. The dead brother being reminded that Techno still has yet to lose his human emotions, but his will to live is no where close where it should be. 

Techno opens his eyes. He looks up to the sky, checking the sun’s placement. “I slept through the night, outside, in the snow”, he notes, standing up. Back letting out cracking noises, god is he this old already. The fallen mask is brushed and placed to its place. Techno stretches his arms out. The memories of yesterday are clear and unbearable, so acting like the interaction never happened is the safest choice. Instead Techno notices how cold he actually is, his whole body is shivering. The shivering man moves his cape so it’s fully around him, protecting him from the cold. It would be impossible to rewrite the letter in the cold and with shivering fingers. Techno sighs defeated, home it is. 

Hours pass by, but Techno is still in the snow forest. Maybe he’s been intentionally walking in a slow pace, avoiding what he came here for. He can still turn back, possibly meeting Bad, Tubbo, Tommy, Fundy or Niki again. They’re all good kids, once they'll run upon an intersection they’ll choose the right one. Not like how he and Wilbur chose the wrong turns, those kids will choose the right one and cause something good to happen. Techno would give anything to just go back to that day when he chose the wrong turn, causing his own downfall. 

He never wanted the title that was given for him. It was all because of that man with the round white mask with a smiley face on it. That man just happened to witness the death of Philz and offer something for the broken young boy. Of course, the voices made the life changing choice. The voices accepted the second choice: “This choice will never let you die. If you’re wise enough you can use it for your own selfish thoughts.” If only Techno was the one to make the choice, but he was not. He tried everything, but nothing succeeded, he was always alive in the end.


	8. Forgiving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One or two chapters to go and then it's the end my child.

It took two days to climb up the mountain that he used to walk up in an hour. Techno wonders how he was even able to drag such a short walk for so long. He has not slept or eaten during that time, not like those are a must to do for him to stay alive. His dead brother has not even tried to hide his presence anymore. Wilbur would randomly pop up, trying to talk to Techno. Techno acted like he was not there, but still always listening for what the other had to say to him. Ignoring Wilbur’s desperate efforts to fix their broken relationship, would’ve only fed the guilt in Techno.

Techno’s crown has never felt this heavy. He can recognize every tree, flower and rock that his eyes can catch. The more steps he takes, the more his emotions stir inside him. Not very far away he can make out three trees full of marks left by a sword and behind them a house. It’s unbelievable how this place has not changed in two centuries. A strong wind goes through Techno, his crown flying off with it. When the crown meets the ground, Techno’s world turns around in his eyes.

“The most important thing is to know how to be more powerful than the voices inside your head Techno”, Skeppy yells. “I’m trying!” Techno yells back, voices screaming for blood in his mind. “Think about your dead family! Sudden emotion change can disturb the voices”, Skeppy mentions, beginning to doubt the young boy's abilities. The idea of first forcing the voices to be awakened and then trying to overthrow them sounded better when only said. Skeppy should’ve guessed, it has not been long since Techno lost his family and gained a life lasting curse. Of course the voices will be at the loudest point, trying to win over the body.

Techno lets out a yell out of pain, losing his balance. Skeppy appears behind him, catching him before he would’ve touched the ground. “You okay, there? Do you still hear them?” Skeppy questions, pushing the other on his feet. Techno takes a moment to listen to his mind and correct his balance. “Yes, I can still hear them, but it’s different. They’re not so loud”, Techno comments, checking unconsciously if his mask was on. “Your mask is still on. Good, it seems like you’ve learned something new today”, Skeppy says, his tone reassuring. Skeppy was once controlled by voices in his head, but he was lucky enough to be able to get rid of them, Techno is not so lucky. 

Techno and Skeppy walk side by side. Techno fumbles with his hair, it has grown a little over his shoulders in five years. Skeppy found him killing innocent creatures and helped him to get control of his own body back. After that Skeppy offered a helping hand, Techno accepted it with an unsure feeling. Back then Techno wasn’t sure if Skeppy truly could help him with the voices. He has told the most important parts of his past to Skeppy, maybe forgetting to tell the reasoning behind the mask and who actually killed who. He didn’t see the need to tell those little details.

“We are here!” Skeppy announces, doing a swirl. Techno raises a questioning eyebrow, Skeppy obviously not seeing the motion. “I thought that since you always wear that crown, why not add a cape to it? Just for the effect, you know” Skeppy explains. Techno touches his crown, a little suspicion raises inside him. “The catch?” The masked boy questions, he kind of can imagine himself walking around with a cape on. Skeppy lets out a laugh. “Well I will be the one making the cape, and you will be the one gathering the resources for it”, Skeppy speaks, clearly proud of his idea. A smirk forms in Techno’s lips as he nods. “Let’s make a cape”, he laughs out. 

For once, Techno wants to stay in his dream as long as the sun burns, but his eyes open eventually. He’s laying on the ground, on the spot where he passed out. He stands up, hands automatically patting himself down. Mask is where it should be, but his crown is not. The memory of his crown flying off with the wind, comes to mind. Panic rushing up, not exactly because of the lost crown, but because of the emerald decorating the crown. The masked man looks around him, he remembers hearing the sound of a crown falling into ground, but he can’t seem to find it. 

“You still have the emerald that Philz gave you”, a quiet voice approaches Techno. Techno looks at Wilbur, the crown is in Wilbur’s hands. Techno puts his arm out, waiting patiently. Wilbur sighs, ignoring the hand as he puts the crown on Techno’s head. Techno is taken by surprise by the other’s action as he backs away. “Well, lets go inside”, Wilbur smiles, turning around. Techno tastes blood in his mouth, he’s been biting inside of his cheek out of a nervous habit. All the doubts crash down on him once again, he should back down. 

“You still have that letter to rewrite!” Wilbur reminds him, waving his hand in front of the door. Just like that, Techno forgets all of his doubts as he makes his way to the door. The door lets out a screeching sound as it's pushed open. The dead one doesn’t hesitate and walks into the house. The alive one takes more hesitant steps into the house. After two centuries, Techno is at home.

Techno’s brain first registers the smelly, at this point possible poisonous, breakfast that was left there waiting for someone to come clean it up. He remembers how normal the morning was that day, if only it would’ve ended normally. “It smells like shit in here”, Wilbur states, flying across the room. “Can dead people still smell?” Techno lets out a question without noticing. Wilbur turns to look at the masked man, who has not muttered a word after the snow forest. “I mean, yes, but that was what made you crack?” Wilbur stares at Techno confused. A little blush of embarrassment rises on Techno’s pale cheeks. “So?” He mumbles, turning around. Wilbur laughs uncontrollably, this is the first time he saw Techno breaking character, if you leave witnessing the breakdown out.

Techno tries to not mind how much Wilbur is laughing behind him. This becomes an easy task as his eyes travel to the two big stones outside. Another one has his father’s name engraved in it, and the other Wilbur’s. Wilbur’s laugh is calming down behind him, but he’s dead and he’s not here. It hits him like lightning, Wilbur is not here. Techno slowly turns his head around to where Wilbur should’ve been flying as a ghost —he’s not there. Techno thinks back to the first time he started hearing Wilbur’s voice again. It was not long after having the dream of his father’s death and sleeping outside on the grass. He could have not imagined seeing and hearing Wilbur. It was all so clear and felt so real.

Techno feels a headache coming in. He looks back at the stones again. There he sees Wilbur waving at him, slowly disappearing for the last time. “It’s not your fault!” Wilbur whispers from next to him, but Techno knows that he’s not here. The broken man had helped his brother to leave the regret behind and continue to the afterlife, but who will help him now. Letting out shaky breaths, he takes out the letter. Techno has hopefully all the answers he needs right now written in the letter, or he will give in to the voices. It’s getting too suffocating again with no one around him.


	9. Blood for blood god

Cape sways as the man walks closer to a specific village. Crown stands proud on his head, but a mask hides the lack of pride in his face. He walked through countless forests and villages. He met new people and discovered old emotions, hidden beneath the guilt. Even his dreams pushed painful and happy memories out of the dark. All this only to turn away. Barely any proof of his visit at home was left behind, a few tears that dried out quickly and pieces of ripped letter. 

He opened his heart only because of an impulsive decision to visit home. In the beginning he did not expect a lot from his trip, he left his cave emotionless with a glint of hope. Everything went wrong, when in his dreams he would see memories of his forgotten past. All of sudden his head was full with little stories of his life up to this point. First he was scared, scared of how his past decided to show during his trip home. Then he started meeting people that reminded his emotions to rise to the surface after all these years. 

The man was scared, confused and lost. Seeing his dead brother’s ghost was the last string holding him together. After believing that his brother blamed him for father’s death and hearing that it’s not true, the string broke. In the house he calls home, tears rained down not stopping when asked to. Emotions switched continuously, voices yelled in his ears and letter told his guilt written in words for once.

Techno stops in front of a ruined banner that used to hang on the walls. During the last visit, the village was celebrating and children were running around. This time there is no celebration, it’s quiet and peaceful, but children have not stopped running around. Old men look him up and down the same way as last time, only now sober and not under the effect of cheap alcohol. Techno brushes their stares off, at least they don’t force him out of the village. 

Techno makes his way to where he had met a young boy full of youth and hope. Something drew him into this village, and unknowingly Techno had followed that something. His gut feeling not warning him of anything or the voices not asking for blood, made the way much more clearer. Techno’s mind is at peace, something he achieved from the visit at home. Mind may be at peace, but the growing need to blur out his heart and emotions is too dangerous to be left alone. Techno dismisses the dangerous part, blurring out human emotions second time doesn’t sound too bad for him.

A high pitched scream alerts Techno to turn around. His hand moving close to his sword, ready to slit a throat open. “Tommy! You can’t just scream like that”, Tubbo smacks his friend to the head. Techno’s muscles relax as he comprehends whose scream it was. “Did you change your mind? Will you teach me!” Tommy questions, moving closer with a huge smile plastered across his face. “Hm. No”, Techno mumbles, seeing how the two boys push and tease each other stirs his emotions. Techno adjusts his mask, this situation is kind of awkward for him. His intention was not to run into these boys, but he can’t help the relief he feels. 

Tommy’s scream has attracted a few side watchers. Those people obviously only watch as the masked man moves. Techno scoffs, if he were to take one step forward to the teenagers, he would be attacked. Tubbo seems to notice, both the side watchers and the annoyed scoff the other let out. “Should we go inside? Fundy and Niki would probably want to talk with you”, Tubbo suggests, reminding Techno of the fox’s and the smart girl’s existences. Techno nods as an agreement. 

The two young boys lead the way to Tubbo’s home. Neither of them find the situation weird or even questionable. This stranger once saved them without even being asked to, of course he’s on the good side. This man also helped their new friends, Fundy and Niki. None of the four actually know his name, but Fundy had mentioned something about it possibly being Technoblade. Names aren’t even that important when it comes to trust. 

As the three walk into Tubbo’s house, they’re greeted with two surprised looks. Fundy was the first to react. He attacked Techno with questions, to which he got no answers. Techno’s interest was more on the way the house was decorated. There were pretty flowers everywhere, but the most dominant smell came from the fresh baked cakes in the kitchen. The four took notice of how their savior’s focus was on entirely different things than their conversation.

Tommy coughs really loudly. This still doesn’t pull the savior from his daydreaming. The four share confused looks. “Technoblade”, Fundy calls out. Niki and Tubbo both hold their breaths, none of them actually know the name their saviour prefers to be called. Techno’s focus is now on the four. The name that was just used takes a while to really swell down. “Techno for short”, Techno says, poorly remembering how he has accidentally said his full length name in front of Fundy before. The four nod their heads, Tubbo and Niki letting themselves breath freely. 

“So is there a reason for your visit here?” Niki asks, probably being the only one with good logical thinking out of the four young people in the room. Techno takes his time thinking what to answer. “Yes”, Techno speaks, all of the attention is on him. He takes a seat. “Do you kids know the story of the blood for blood god’s?” Techno asks. Niki and Fundy shake their heads. “Somewhat”, Tubbo and Tommy say in unison. “They say that he was a human and then another god turned him to a god, because he did something bad. He is said to be an evil god, but every now and then he does some good deeds”, Tubbo tells, eyes shining with excitement. Tommy laughs at his friend’s passionate way of talking about this god. “Most of that is bullshit”, Techno states, taking his crown down. He stares at the green emerald that’s decorating it beautifully. 

Blood for blood god was once a human, but he never turned into an actual god. He was just given the title of god by humans after stories about him started to spread around, most of them being nothing like what actually happened. When he was born his family threw him away, just because his hair colour didn’t count as normal. Luckily a nice old man found him and took him in as his own son. That old man protected the future ‘god’ from those who thought the same as his biological parents did. 

Then his father found another lost boy. It took them just a day to acknowledge each other as brothers. Their father started leaving them alone more often, because there were now two of them. Sadly two wasn’t enough against ten adults. Blood for blood god was kidnapped by crazy people and taken to a laboratory. He was just glad that his brother wasn’t taken too. It took ten months for his father to find him and get him out of that laboratory. He was maybe freed from the torture, but he was left with a nasty looking scar on his face. 

For his whole childhood this future ‘god’ had suffered from voices inside his head asking for blood. Once those voices almost caused him to kill his own brother. After that he did not suffer too much because of the voices. Then happened the laboratory incident. He was able to control himself, but it tired him out. Then it happened, he lost the fight against the voices. The next thing he knew, he had stabbed his father. His father didn’t blame him even on his last breath, this left a permanent mental scar to the future ‘god’. Someone witnessed the whole scene. That witness offered two choices for the broken kid: Either die now or become an immortal and never die. Sadly the boy was not the one making that decision, the voices were in control and chose immortality. 

After that he tried everything to end the guilt he was feeling. Only for his brother to kill himself in front of him. Blood for blood god lost it at that moment, he gave into the voices. He suffered centuries of guilt that grew every time he drew his bloody sword back to its place. Then it came to him.

“What if he visited his home? And so he did, but it turned out way different he thought”, Techno takes a deep breath in. Niki, Tommy, Tubbo and Fundy don’t know how to react to the story they were just told. Techno puts his crown back on, wiping a wet circular thing away from his cheek. “Are you the one in the story?” Tubbo questions, his voice comes out quiet and unsure. “Can’t decline or confirm that”, Techno smiles, feeling weird about how he poured his life story on four kids. “That’s kind of cool”, Tommy mumbles, earning a hit to his head by Tubbo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sad :(( Sadly this story is close to its end my dear child...


	10. Chapter 10

No one seems to be brave enough to utter a word. Tommy was the last one to say something before the seemingly endless quietness fell around the five. Techno is trying to push the weird feeling of relief, while the younger four are too busy deciding on the right words. Techno bites inside of his cheek, nervous habit. The masked man has so much more to tell, but telling more to these kids would be very shameful and hurt is pride. 

“About the laboratory…” Fundy utters, eyes fixated on the wooden floor. “How long exactly was it running before it was destroyed? I mean, if they tried the same thing they did to me on this blood for the blood god centuries ago”, Fundy’s voice comes out very shaky, obviously bad memories coming to him. “Blood for the blood god was one of the first they tried the experiment on, of course failing, but they continued evolving it throughout the centuries. I would say it was running around 274 years before it was destroyed. Around 15 000 deaths, 190 000 fails and 20 successful results, all together over 200 000 tries”, Techno answers, he had somewhat kept up with the laboratory’s doings. He regrets everyday not destroying it sooner, but he was scared of his own reaction from coming in contact with the laboratory's walls and people who worked there or those who were used as experiments. Fundy nods, it’s taking him alot to process this new information.

Niki is the only one who has not yet shown her reaction, either verbally or physically. Tommy seems to be the only one who takes the situation lightly. The young boy would be asking questions if it were not for Tubbo keeping him quiet. Niki fidgets with her fingers, wandering in her thoughts trying to find words to speak. “Why would you tell us all this? You call us literal kids, but still told us how you became immortal”, Niki questions. Techno smiles, he knew Niki would be the one to question his motives. “Hm. I’ll tell you when I figure it out myself too”, Tehno speaks with his monotone voice. Niki’s eyes stay on Techno, looking for any signs of lying or bad intentions. Her eyes shift to the floor after concluding that Techno is like a rock: hard to understand, only has one look, not sure if it will hurt you before coming to contact with it. 

Techno was left alone in Tubbo’s home while the others went to buy food. Tubbo insisted him to stay the night and promised that his parents will not come home tonight. The masked man could not refuse the kind offer, it’s better to be around other living things than alone in a cold and dark cave. Techno doesn’t know how he ended up staying in a cave for tens of years, but in the cave’s protection he couldn’t hurt anybody. It was like he didn’t even exist on earth, while he transformed the cave into a livable place. It was discovered by random hunters just before he left for his trip home. That reminds him of the bloody mess waiting for him to be cleaned back in the cave. Those hunters were not very tidy people, even when they lied dead in the cave’s floor. 

“I am such a good influence on these kids”, Techno notes, hugging his own legs. He’s killed countless humans both good and bad. These days he kills only bad people. He’s killed his own family member, there’s nothing stopping him accidentally killing these kids. Vulnerability does not reflect on him very well. He walks holding his head high, his clothes only boosting the confident act. Though at the moment he’s struggling to keep up the act. Hugging his legs as a way to comfort himself, waiting for four kids to come back, only to force his act more. He needs to leave, staying is not a choice. 

Emotions rushing to the surface, trying to force the masked man to show emotions. Regret is the lucky one to be shown physically. Techno grips his back, veins showing clearly from how hard his grip is. Disappointing is part of his nature at this point. There’s no tears to fall, since there’s no reason to cry. He lets out a sigh, as a new kind of regret forms inside him. “Pathetic”, he scoffs, taking the clear version of his letter out of his secret pocket. The masked man leaves the house, cape dragging behind him. He disappears into an alley, pink braid disappearing last. 

Laughs fill the house as the four return with hands packed with food. No one seems to notice the empty space in the room. Niki drops the food in her hands, her eyes frantically looking around the room. “Guys, Techno is gone”, Niki mumbles. Tubbo is the first to react, he leaves the food on some counter and runs through the whole house. “I can’t find him”, Tubbo announces, a little out of breath from running around. “He- He can’t just leave like that!” Tommy says in disbelief. “I guess this was kind of expected from him”, Fundy comments, picking up the food that Niki had dropped. As he crouches down, his eyes fall down on the letter waiting for them. “Look! He left a letter”, Fundy says, pointing at the letter. 

Niki being the closest one to it picks it up. She inspects it first, hesitantly opening it after. A little note falls down. “Well what did he write in it?” Tommy asks, dying of curiosity. “Well in the note there basically reads that this letter is written a long ago, and he left it here to teach us about life’s cycle, or something”, Niki reads, showing the letter with her other hand. Tubbo steals the letter from Niki’s hand. “Maybe we shouldn’t read it. Considering the story he told, this may be more personal… You know” Tubbo explains, avoiding the faces of his friends. “Tubbo, he wouldn’t have left it to us for us to not read it”, Fundy sighs, stealing the letter from Tubbo. Tubbo wants to protest, but his friend is probably right. 

“Potatoes are under the rock in the right corner”, Fundy reads aloud. Tommy lets out a loud laugh. “What’s actually written in it?” Niki questions. Fundy looks at them, a serious look in his eyes. “That’s the only thing written in this”, the human like fox utters, turning the letter so the other three can see it. “No way… Did he want us to learn this?” Tubbo says confused. The air feels more calm now. At least they know somewhat where Techno hides his potatoes.

Techno walks through the forest, the moon giving only a little light just enough to see ahead. Wind sways the trees’ leaves, rustling sound filling the forests. The sound calming Techno’s mind. The regret he felt when he disappeared unannounced is no longer present, it has left long ago. After meeting new people and shedding blood, going back to the lonely cave is rather needed. Earlier the topic was a little sensitive to think about, but nature has its way of easing the mind sometimes.

The cave is now his home. The house located far away is now only part of his memories. Emotions sorted out, past grudges cleared out and the forgiven words of his brother clear in his mind. It won't take long until he will once again forget his past and live in despair, but the difference is now that he can look for kids and Bad to tell his thoughts. Techno’s lips curl up forward, there are now people, who are alive, who know the real story of the blood for the blood god. Bad will properly hear it, when the future brings them together when the right time comes. 

The voices are there and always will be, but Techno understands them now. He doesn’t have to be scared of those voices, they can never have power of the body ever again. They have caused chaos and a lot of things to think about, but it’s all in the past now. Maybe in the furthest parts of the mind there’s still something to resolve, but Techno will lock it out. Everything comes when it’s it time, there’s no need to rush things

Techno stretches his hands back. “When I get back, I need to eat my own potatoes”, he notes. He takes out the note that he had written the locations of his potatoes on. He adjusts his mask, eyeing the letter. The masked man seems to have given the wrong letter to the kids. “Eh. I’ll remember where my potatoes are”, Techno shrugs. He at least left something for the kids to read, it’s not that important anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm the worst when it comes to coming up with good endings. So please excuse this sad and pathetic try of writing a happy ending.
> 
> Yes my child, it is never told what's written in that letter and it will forever stay as a mystery. Only because I myself have no idea what should've have been in that letter. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! I'll maybe write a 'second season' if I have the motivation.


End file.
